Funny clean one-liner jokes
WebJul 29, 2024 · 75 of Billy Connolly’s best jokes, one-liners and quips “You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said ‘Parking Fine.’ So... 1. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. 2. I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any. 3. I failed math so many times at school, I can’t even count. 4. I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke. 5. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but … See more 21. Russian dolls are so full of themselves. 22. The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing someone’s cast. 23. Light travels faster than sound, which is the reason that … See more 41. The future, the present, and the past walk into a bar. Things got a little tense. 42. Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you’re … See more 81. A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of three. He says, ‘Uno, dos…” and poof! He disappeared without … See more 61. If attacked by a mob of clowns, go for the juggler. 62. The man who invented Velcro has died. RIP. 63. Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular. 64. A dung beetle walks … See more
Funny clean one-liner jokes
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WebFunny one liners. Smaller babies may be delivered by storks but the heavier ones would need a crane! 92.42 % / 304 votes. Not saying I live in a rough area but just bought an advent calendar and half the windows are boarded up! 86.20 % / 1003 votes. WebThe short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
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WebJul 8, 2024 · Relax, we've got your back. Here are 60 funny, clever, and oh-so-smart one-liners that are perfect for any occasion. Commit them to memory, and you'll have your friends laughing so hard they won't even remember why the conversation had lagged in the first place. Clever one-liners to have on-hand WebJan 21, 2024 · Kid 2: “Yeah, just ask your sister.”. Kid 1: “I don’t have a sister.”. Kid 2: “You will in about nine months.”. Tap To Copy. When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper …
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WebTwo hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing, so his friend calls 911. 'My friend is dead! What should I do?" The operator replies, "Calm down, sir, first make sure that he's really dead." There's a silence, then a loud bang. Back on the phone, the guy says, "Ok, now what?" capri eataly yelphttp://www.jokesclean.com/OneLiner/ caprifischer chords in c durWebJan 6, 2024 · Short jokes for kids What did the man say to his fingers? I’m counting on you. How does the ocean say hello? It waves. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Summer wasn’t bad either. How do pigs do... brittany cartwright jobWebFunny Mark TwainClean One Liner Jokes. Mark Twain, that prolific witty author who brought to us the delightful tale of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, was a quick witted man who seldom kept his opinion to himself! Here are a few examples of his wit and wisdom: Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. capri fashion srlWebBrilliant One-Liner Jokes: 100+ Best To Brighten Your Day. These are the most brilliant one-liner jokes you’ll ever read. They come from many different authors and comedians. Some of them are from unknown comics, while others are the creations of comedy legends. But all of them are truly hilarious. brittany cartwright newsWebA one-liner, also known as a punchline in some cases, is a truly remarkable form of a joke. First of all, it is so short that by telling it, you’ll never miss the ‘magical moment’ and will always leave your audience amused (that is, if … brittany cartwright net worth 2020WebJun 8, 2024 · "What did one wall say to the other?" "I'll meet you at the corner." "What did the zero say to the eight?" "That belt looks good on you." "A skeleton walks into a bar and says, 'Hey, bartender. I'll have one beer … caprified figs